salaam girls........

farz karain aap ka shohar aa say doosri shaadi ki ijaazat mangta hai to kiya aap usay permission dain gee?

This question is for all married + unmarried girls.

Hairat k iss topic main abhi tak kisi ne rep kyun nahi kia ??? neways ... Such a difficult question Main aik insaan ban kar reply karongi means koi bari bari farishton jesi batien na karongi [ ] the answer is simply "No" par ajj kal k jou halaat main dekh rahi hon ... m amazd k some ppl in the old age lag bhag 80 years k aik 30 years ki aurat se shaadi karna ajj bhi munasib samajhty hain ... these days thats not only happen in villages but also in cities ... Nice question u asked n my answer is simply NO

Walaikum as salaaamz

it depends on da situation ... if mahhusband eva asks me for 2nd marriage, he betta hav ans to mahh questions...

n like every gal i wudnt allow him nythin juz like dat... but ... da impt thing is .. k kaheen woo sirf is dar se k main osse 2nd marriage allow nahien karoon gi, koi gunah ya kuch haram nahine kar raha ... if i hav even a minor idea of him goin on the rong path, than i'd certainly allow him for marriage ..

agreed..

my answer is same as she said,

everything depends on the situation..

toh kuch bhi kaha nahi jasakta filhal.

Ok T.S I would lyk to ask a question if this thing ever happen
tou kya u will allow him to re-marry buss iss darr se k woh koi ganda kaam na kar le ... tumhien nahi lagta k aaise insaan ko uski ghalti ka ehsaas dilana chaheye na k yeh k hum usko ijazat de dien k jao gunnah na karo bus shaadi kar lo

[b]" jao gunnah na karo bus shaadi kar lo " ... answers ur question.... if a man afterall is allowed to do 4 marriages in our religion than wat the heck is our problem??? dude we gotta open up pur mind.... yeh ijazat ko religion main hai sirf avain nahien di gaii ... there r many medical reasons behind it ... am not goin to state em here..

ghaltii ka ehsaas kaisse dilaoo gi?? " U CANT MARRY NYONE" n after dat.... may b he is doin eveythin dat u can imagine of .... kis ko gunah mile ga ... both of u ... y not juz let him go n marry ... obviously we girls dun like to share hubby's ... but like.. grow up ! one's only committin bigger sins by stoppin dis..[/b]

kahan ho larkion

@ A.P .. how can you realize HIM of his mistake .. ..

@ T.S .. good Counter-argument (I wonder - it's first time that some girl has given this argument in such question) .. i was about to ask that if a man is allowed to do 4 marriages at a same time then why female doesn't allow em .. ? Yeah, it's true and factual medically as well .. but i guess most of the people here don't know the medical reasons and never have searched on those - medically there is very less awareness of these facts here in pakistan.

A better answer from a girl could have been that she must try first to mold him not to go for a second marriage. There would have been certain reasons behind his decisions and if those reasons are in result of girls mistake, ignorance towards him or watever .. then she must first try to attract him towards herself.

From a guy perspective, i'd like to quote a hadees - don't remember it exactly but i am trying to quote watever i remember ..

bina parda aurat shaitan hoti aur mard ko apni taraf attract krti hai. mard ko chahiye k jab b koi aisi situation ho to sab say pehlay apni bivi ka sochay aur apni bivi say rabta karay.

The main reason of quoting this hadees here is that if a man just want to marry someone 'caz someone has attracted him and he has not control over his desires then HE must think of his existing partner .. only this can not be a reason to do so .. and in this case he is wrong .. but if there are some other reasons then he has the right to do it.

First of all I have said in my first post that I dont want to be an angel 2nd thing the way m talking isnt chlidhish ok m facing the reality m not from those people jou kahien kuch aur karien kuch ... have u ever experienced ne woman jisky hubby ne yeh kaam kia ho ajj kal k zamany main aur woh itni khamoshi se islami ban kar kahy k chalo kar lo sabash ... aise tou phir har aik ka yehi mashghala na baan jaye ok islaam ki baat karti ho na tum tou chalo lemme clear u a thing in islam loundiyan humari maids bhi halaal hain mard k lye got it??? ijazat dou gi kya app apny hubby ko k woh apki maid k saath bhi wohi relation rakhy ju k app k saath rakhta hai phir kya woh medically sahi hoga??? kyunki hoga tou phir woh islamically will u allow him to do so??? u said it depends on situation if u quote islam here then u must also know this thing ... will u allow ur hubby to have a same relation wid ur maid???

second thing wot I.M asked ... listen the questin is related to my husband n I knw atleast the one I will get married he will be educated man ... aur woh tab aesa kary ga jab mujh main kammi hogi aur ager koi husband aesa kaam apni wife k achy hony k bawajood karta hai tou it means k woh ghalt hai ... iska simple way hai k leave this kind of person kyunki ju aik ka na bann saka woh agey mazeed kya karyga mery pass itna bara dil nahi k woh kisi aur se shaadi kar ley aur main kahon kar lo my love meko koi aaitraaz nahi ya k main yeh kahon k thek hai meri muddat pori hui ... app log yahan islam ko quote katy ho tou main kahongi k islami bananah buht mushkil hai ager app latey ho islam ko apni life main tou phir har baat ko sumjho phir bolo islam main ju jaiz aur na jaiz hai kya hum sab wohi karty hain???

main ne khudh ko aaisi situation main imagine kar k hi kaha hai kyunki I have seen many cases lyk this aur i knw k jab aik mard aesa karta hai tou uski biwi par kya guzarti hai ... mostly u ppl know k kab hota hai aesa ... k jab aulad na ho tab sohar ko ijazat de di jati hai k woh shaadi kar lye aur jab aik aurat ka mamla ata hai tou usko samjhotey ka kaha jata hai I ask u ppl k kya koi husband apni wife ko yeh ijazat dega k woh usko chor kar dousri shaadi kar ley ...

U people qoute islam than phir lyk u can say that the research in syria by islamic muslims r rite that if a man can do 4 marriages than y A woman cant ???? wot do u ppl say for this ???

agreed about your green color comment

idhr islam ko quote krnay ka maqsad ye hai k puranay zamanay ki aurtain b to ijazat daiti thi .. aisa kya hai jo aaj ki aurat ijazat nahi deti .. ? even agr mard ka decision sahi b hai even then female just don't allow him .. why .. kya puranay zamanay aur aaj k zamany ki aurat feeling vise different hai .. ? kya hai k jo aaj ki aurat aisa krnay say mana krti hai .. ?

maid wali baat ka reply thehar k karou ga .. leme first confirm it first.

ok F9 tomorrow I will clear the whole thing k ajkal ki mentallity kyun diff hai by quoting lyf experiences as well as islam

n thanks

Yeah sure u can ... n in islam ... woh lodiyan ju khareedi hui hain bina nikkah k bhi halaal hain

I got wat i was looking for .. but i had wrong understanding of it .. just confirmed it from number of friends and now don't have that comment on maid thingy .. ..

may be you are right .. but yet i have to confirm. But right now i don't have any argument to negate it ..

First of all I have said in my first post that I dont want to be an angel

do i luk like one ?
2nd thing the way m talking isnt chlidhish ok m facing the reality m not from those people jou kahien kuch aur karien kuch ...

dats how everyone shud b like !

have u ever experienced ne woman jisky hubby ne yeh kaam kia ho ajj kal k zamany main aur woh itni khamoshi se islami ban kar kahy k chalo kar lo sabash ... aise tou phir har aik ka yehi mashghala na baan jaye

wat on earth is dis suppose to mean???? do u visit every house on this planet to c wats goin on ?

ok islaam ki baat karti ho na tum tou chalo lemme clear u a thing in islam loundiyan humari maids bhi halaal hain mard k lye got it???

go do a bit research on dis hun !!... if am not rong .. londi, slave girl hoti hai ??? rite? Muslims just cannot do nythin wid slaves without marrying em first.

Surah Al-Ahzaab (revealed in Medina), 33:50 actually means: “ We [God] have made lawful for you, O Prophet, wives to whom you have given their dowers, and God-given maids and captives you have MARRIED…. This is a privilege only for you [Prophet] and not the other believers.” {this verse has been translated rong by many ppl ... }

the verses 23:1-7 [Surah Al-Muminun, revealed in Mecca] tell us the following: “ The true believers will be successful, who are humble in their service, who shun all frivolities, who strive for betterment, who guard their @@@, except for their wives, and ‘women slaves of old’ [who had been in possession of their masters since the pre-Islamic days] are free from blame.” The verse 7 of Surah Al-Muminin only accepts the fait accompli – slave girls whose masters had been sleeping with them since the pre-Islamic period, were allowed to do so. It is just a case of allowing NOT promoting the pre-Islamic custom. We find the same injunction in Surah Al-Maarij (Meccan), verses 29-30: “And those who guard their @@@ except from their wives and women slaves of old, are free of blame.”

in otha words... laundii pre-islamic age main allowed thi .. AB NAHINE ... aur jo loog yeh samajhte hain k ab bhi allowed hain n they doo stuff... shall b STONNED TO DEATH !



ijazat dou gi kya app apny hubby ko k woh apki maid k saath bhi wohi relation rakhy ju k app k saath rakhta hai phir kya woh medically sahi hoga???


lolz... stop pointin out mah medically stated statement.... I WUD KILL HIM if he hides dis n does it ... I WUD ALLOW HIM *** AFTER ALOT OF TALK N IF ITS MAH FAULT***

kyunki hoga tou phir woh islamically will u allow him to do so??? u said it depends on situation if u quote islam here then u must also know this thing ... will u allow ur hubby to have a same relation wid ur maid???


as i said ... it depends on the situation ... if it is mahh fault n if there is no cum back for him ... den i'll go wid wat i said !




P.S. I dun think this topic was meant to b debated islamically..!!! -- correct me if am rong S.E

main ne khudh ko aaisi situation main imagine kar k hi kaha hai

main ne bhi imagine kar k hi kaha hai .... cuz shaadi too hoi nahien meri

kyunki I have seen many cases lyk this aur i knw k jab aik mard aesa karta hai tou uski biwi par kya guzarti hai ...


MURDER... aik nahien 10 baar.... MUJH se cheatin ki .. MUJH SE????? .. lolz .. yehi na?

mostly u ppl know k kab hota hai aesa ... k jab aulad na ho tab sohar ko ijazat de di jati hai k woh shaadi kar lye aur jab aik aurat ka mamla ata hai tou usko samjhotey ka kaha jata hai I ask u ppl k kya koi husband apni wife ko yeh ijazat dega k woh usko chor kar dousri shaadi kar ley ...


hmm.. sirf aulad k chakar main nahien .. bal-k lack of attention, lack of care, lack of communication bhi in sab cheezoo'n ki reason hai ...

since u were talkin abt islam so much ... do u not knw dat its not allowed for a women to do more marriages???? n for men... dey shall marry widows n stuff... not teenagers... so THANDAK!

U people qoute islam than phir lyk u can say that the research in syria by islamic muslims r rite that if a man can do 4 marriages than y A woman cant ???? wot do u ppl say for this ???

i say they r stupid..!!! like grow up .. if u really wanna go against the religion den SAY IT openly.. dun do surverys or researches or wat not...

men ko yeh nahien kaha k jo larki achi lage kar lo os se shaadi .... DUDE! go do research on dis n how its suppose to b done !

Lack of knowledge

i dun agree wid this .... bring me hadees....

i knw dis was okay in pre-islamic dayz !

Mujay ijazat milay gi...

yeh kahan chala gaya topic

yeh kahan likha hua hai?

Hmm T.P n A.P abi app dono k comments pardli n i think k evr1 has their own personal opinion aur jo qs Silent eyes neh post ki hei im sure its just a personal opnion whethr u wud gve permision 4 ur husband 2 mary sum1 else personally mein kabhi ijazat nhi dunghi never neverrrr haha tum srf mere ho samje hubby haha kahin jane nhi dunghi tmhe

Aur Islam ki baat mein bas itna janti hn k husband can marry 4 times biwi ko talaaq deh ya na deh lkin biwi phr shaadi nhi krskti i think :S dnt aruge on my research lol its jus sumthin mein janti hn

n i think k app dono bht serious ho hogaye ho right:s dnt no

N nice topic Silent eyes

lolz.. serious nahien hain .... juz addin-on to our knowledge

Depends ap ki biwi kya kehti hei

oookieee lol pardrahi ti kafi interstd ti aur app dono like dishuuum dishuuummmm no im rite shorry

hmmmmmmmmm tum ne sahi kaha par islam k aane se pahlay aisa tha k aap par londiaan hallal thein... par jab se islam aaya aur tab islam ne is ko manah karrar dai dia.. means ager koi londiyoon ko use karay ga tou wo Zannah k zamray main aajyee ga.. aur Zannah karne walay ki maafi bhi nahi ho gi..

Sorry Maafi galat kah dia... yani k Allah os ki koi duwa bhi qabool nahi karay ga

bohat he acha topic hai

kafi doston k replys perhay hain

ab main kuch doston k sawalat per baat kerna chahoon gaa

Merd ke 4 shaddiyaan kerny ke bohat se wajhoohaat hain

jab kisi aurat ka sohar shaheed hoo jata tha ya wafaat pa jata tha tu os aurat ko shambhalny wala nahi hota tha
os k bachoon ke perwarish kerny wala na hota tha .....ejazat es leeay dee gayee k un ko sahara milay

omat e muslima zayada hoo es leeay bhee
( ab christian world main sab sy zayada hain lakin qayamat main muslims zayada hoonge )

muslim bachioon ko shadi main koe pershani na hoo es leeay

( duniya ke dosree qoumoo main aurtoon ke tadaad zayada hai banisbat merdoon k )

ok just had quite a long discussion over this "londi" (maid/slave) thing and it is not HALAL today .. ok ..

you will be able to find few quranic ayat and ahadees related to it (i don't have it to post here) but all those were related to the age wen islam was being preached .. you can call it "zaman-e-jahliat" .. un dino hi londi aap pr halal thi .. mager ab nahi hai. is cheez say related aap ko bohat saray FATWAY molvio say mil sktay hain aur un fatwou mai clearly aap ko samjhaya gya hai k pehlay zamanay mai slave q halal thi ..

us zamanay mai londi ka concept ye nahi tha k aap kisi ko b buy kr k lay aao 2-3 month rakho .. un dino log GHULAMO ko buy krtay thay jab wo chotay hotay thay .. un ko apnay paas hi rakhtay aur un ki zair-e-nagrani hi wo baray hotay thay .. (hr ghulam nahi bt kafi saray) - is ghulam mai aur us ghulam mai fark hai jo aap aaj kal hareedo .. ? (got it .. ?) - londi halaal hoi is k peechay un wars ka reason b hai jis mai bohat saray kafaaar maaray jatay thay aur un ki wives as slave aati thi aur baad mai muslmaan un say hi shadi krtay thay .. us waqt k zamana mai slave ka ceoncept diff tha ..

aaj ki life mai slave k saath aap ka relation jaiz nahi unless k aap us k saath NIKAH na karo.

sirf nikaah k baad hi aap ka aisa relation jaiz hai .. aap kisi ko buy krlo to it does not mean k aap ka us k saath ye relation ka haq hai.

I have heard this argument (the red one) from many people and i wonder about the authentication of it .. :s ..

for me this is a lamest excuse .. children are blessing .. but leaving a *nice/perfect* partner just 'caz they are not having children is rubbish .. at least in my point of view. You are saying by placing yourself in the position .. and i am saying this by placing myself at this position that if i have a good partner with whom i have good understanding, she cares for me, she loves me .. then i won't even think to leave her even for children thingy*.

thanks for quranic reference ..

aray dear aap ajeeb hoo pehlay molvi ke sir pay dhoop rahay hoo k wo batay ga k keune halal the phir kud he cocept bol rahay hoo

khair

concept ye hai ke

os door main gulamoon ko apni property samjaha jata tha....jaysay hum apni cheez ko kul ker estamaal kertay hain .....esee tarha wo log bhee apne gulamoon k sath asa he salook kertay thay ........chahey wo khareedeen hoo ya maal e ghaneemat main
aye hoon ............lakin jab islam aya tu os ny es cheez sy mana ker deea



or dear ye aap ny slave diffrence bhee khob bataya



pehili baat tu ye hai k aj kal k door main slave nahi hotay nukar ya mulazim hotay hain jin ko hum pay kertay hain

os door main slave ko pay nahi keea jata tha wo on ke apni property mane jatay thay


i hope samaj a gaya hoo gaa

quite right

i have seen many casses as you are saying


but one question to both Airy_Princess & IrrAtionaL MethanE


agar bivi bhee pakbaz hoo,bachay bhee suljhay howay,samajdar, young hoon

phir bhee ek shaks dosree shadi ker layta hai tu

os ka kaya ????





it is not just a question ( a real case )

dosri shadi osi surat main kar sakta hay jab BV ijazat dai...BV ka agree hona lazimi hai.. aap os ki baghair permission k shadi nahi kar saktay.. ager BV ne ijazat nahi dai aur aap ne shadi kar li tou wo Jaiz nahi hai.

jo mai bol raha hou wo summary ki summary ki summary hai .. .. is liye kaha k molvi detail bta sktay hain ..

and wat ever you said is right .. I had the same thinking in mind before writing .. but have not jotted down in that way .. so the conclusion to your and my point is same .. that "since there is no concept of slavary in todays world so how can we say that it's legal to have a relation with your servant today" ..

that is the answer to A.P's line that "londi is halaal"

first of all .. whether every thing is perfect or imprefect. if a male wants to do another marriage he first have to get persmission from his wife + he should be in the position to keep both wives happy and the same time.(islamically)

so if this is the case what you are saying - then in my opinion the man is totally wrong .. we don't know the reasons behind his 2nd marriage but the way you have portrayed the scenario - it's going against man

mara nahi kayal k ye baat durust hai


do you have islamic proof?

hmmmmmmmmmm

Allah maaf kare ga aur dua bhi qabool kare ga.. ager astakhfaar karain too ...


Allah sab maaf kare ga sivaye Shirk k ...

main ne too suna tha k qayamat main muslims kam hooon ge

yeh joo baat ap ne likhi hai ( in red) .. yeh mujhe kuch samajh nahien aii ... agr omat-e-muslima ko barhaaana hi hai too kisi aik se shaadi kar k 10 bache ho sakte hain ... cud u bring sum authentic verse on this?

waisse too yeh saval mujh se nahien hai .. lekin avain apni contribution bhi de detii hoon..

agr sab kuch set hai too husband kharab kar raha hai ... lekin reason yeh bhi hosakti hai k wife apne husband ko itna time na deti hoo... but since dosri side ki story nahien pata, is liye husband wrong hai

Intresting question

situation jo bhi ho => no way!! main kabhi ijazat nahi doongi

Tum se ijazat maang kon raha hay

hehe machar ne bhi kya baat boli hai

hmm.....question bhi perha aaur sab ke replies bhi....and like most of the girls mera answer bhi yehi hai ke main ijazat nahin doon ge......lakin I guess woh to wahi karega jo usne decide ker liya hai....meray ijazat dene ya na dene se usey koi farq nahin parre ga....ager to woh shadi is liye kerna chahta hai ke he started to like some1 else...then I wud try to communicate with him and try to figure out the problem jis waja se woh kisi aur ki taraf mayal hoa....but if I have been fulfilling all of my responsibilites aur woh styl khush nahin hai... then I wud want to leave him.....lekin mujhe is sey pehle aur bhi boht si batain sochni parrain ge....sab se pehli baat ke humari society main divorce aik choti si baat nahin samjhi jaati.....aur sab us aurrat ko kese dekhtay hain ...we all know that.....and gotta think abt the children too.....cuz for sure esi cheezon ka bachon per acha effect nahin hota....

BUT.....if my husband wants to remarry with the intensions of helping a woman.....then well...I will give him permission to do that....lakin phir usay bhi boht si baatain sochni hongi...such as..how wud he balance his life?.....wud he be able to support two families? aur ager woh na ker paya to phir woh is waja se create hone wali problems ko face kerne ke liye ready hai ya nahin...aur ager usne waqai sawab kamane ke liye shadi kerni hogi aur ager usne apni donon wives ke haqooq pore nahin kiye to use gunah mile ga...so..it will be important for him to understand this fact as well.....but it depends on him..ke woh in cheezon ko sochta hai ya nahin....

Ager to mere husband main itni aqal hoi ke woh in sab baton ko samajhta ho and after thinkin he comes to the conclusion that ....no he wont be able to balance....to woh esa fasla nahin karre ga....lakin ager aqal per perda parra hoa to he wud styl go ahead and do it......in the second case support to main use karon gi cuz mujhe kisi aur aurat ko humaray jese mu'ashray main rultay hoye dekh ker koi khushi nahin ho gi.........then the rest I will leave on Allah (to give me saber cuz afterall its really not as easy as it seems)....

Lastly, aik sawal hai keh.....is this the only way to save some1's life?

I read all replies from everyone... but my opinion is that... NO... I wont allow him to do such thing in any case... mera husband sirf mera hai.. I am devoting my life for him.. taking care of things and taking responsibilities of him & children so he should be wid me...
and rahi baat islamically... to guys.. get over it... ap wese konse baqi islamic faraiz anjaam dete hain.. jo ap 4 shadiyon ki ijazat hai to isko pura karne chale hain..